Talkin' Mouf: Long Lost DeMarcus Cousins Watch Nov. 30th, 2010

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Long Lost DeMarcus Cousins Watch Nov. 30th, 2010

I repeat: This actually has nothing to do with DeMarcus Cousins, but moreso lookalikes who could be long lost cousins separated at birth or some shit. I dunno. Go away. No, don't go away, look at these:

Dale Davis and D.L. Hughley

This is a classic from the old Talkin' Mouf page before it was burned to the ground by secret Assassini. I don't think D.L. appreciated it back in the day, which is why he changed his hair.

Tayshaun Prince and Redman

Ah what a rush. Method Man and Redman, Starsky and Hutch. Well, they both look high in these pics, so there's that.

Andre Kirilenko's Hair and Zangief's Hair

Ummm, I need help here. This might not fit.

Andre Kirilenko's Hair and Guile's Hair

Maybe a bit better. I'm not sure. I think I'm in trouble here.

Fuck Bogut and Leelee Sobieski

Ah. All better. (Not sure who it's more insulting to--him or her. Fuck Bogut.)

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I eat hair.

What is Talkin' Mouf?

"Talkin' Mouf" is a phrase coined by an old high school classmate, Christopher Smalls. During a heated tournament game of hoops on the hard concrete at the Rucker--ok, it was actually a friendly pickup game during gym class at Stuyvesant High School--someone was having a particularly good game and engaged in some benevolent smack talk. "Ooooh, he talkin' MOUF!" exclaimed Smalls. And thus, the universe's best and most popular (not really) catchphrase was born.

Trailblazing hack writer, who's still not really a writer, MrCHUPON (that's me) took this phrase and used it as a name for a hoops-focused page of his pathetic NYU student website. The page was almost entirely done up in the style of SLAM Magazine's "Hype" and HoopsTV's "Smack Talk" (I think it was called that). He even had a line or two periodically submitted to "Smack Talk" (it had to do with Vin Baker getting a double double less often than he had double chins).

He then went on to write for the NYU men's basketball team, the Violets (yeah motherfucker, that was our team name, get off my back), for the school paper, the Washington Square News where he was given a column by sports editor and roommate Lawrence Chan, which he named--what else?--"Talkin' Mouf." Which, of course, the NON-sports copy editors quickly renamed "The Talkin' Mouf", before proceeding to check his articles for "spelling errors" such as "Shaquille O'Neal" (which they corrected to "O'Neill"--really? REALLY??).

Alas, those columns are old news, and his NYU homepage has been since taken down, but thanks to the mysteries of the internet, "Talkin' Mouf" is newly revived and ready for--well, not a damn thing. This page is unintentionally unprofessional, lazy, and mean.