Notes From The Thread, Nov. 17, 2010

Pipes: Mike _'Antoni's coaching just makes my dick itch.

Flamingo: Real talk--women sell their eggs all the time. Dell Curry could start a similar business. Seth & Steph are a powerful resume.

Grimlock: Being a student of Sabermetrics, and being a hater of lame euro bigs, and specifically being of the opinion that all 07 Mavericks not named Dirk would have still advanced to the finals I've been imagining a new stat.  We already have WAR: "wins above replacement." I propose "Wins Above a Player Who Ceased to Exist." It would be called WARP, because it would be determined by going back in time and shooting the player's mother in the head the night he was conceived.

Izzy Smoove: I still remember when I first saw Brittney Griner. I was like, ummm... wow, that's a big girl.

Grimlock: Current beer pong record: 1-1. I blame the lack of hip hop music for the loss. [Ed. note: This has nothing to do with anything. I just chuckled.]

Grimlock: Waka Flocka Flame looks like that homie from Goodburger.

Me: While we're on rappers... Shyne is now getting in touch with his Stou_emire side and has embraced Judaism. Instead of "Shyne", I suppose we should call him "Stein" from here on out: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/11/11/arts/music/11shyne.html You know what that gets from me?

  

Flamingo: San Antonio is 6-1 and Coach Pop used to work for the CIA... not that the two are necessarily related, but I'm just sayin'...

Boys Don't Cry

Riptor: I was just watching the UConn-Baylor game and Brittney Griner gets more ticky tack fouls than Durant. I still don't see how a motionless person with arms raised can possibly foul someone. Especially on 3 straight possessions. 


I can't do this anymore. 


It also didn't help that it was some freshman chick playing D. This all happened in like the first 2 minutes of the game and it's like UConn's first game of the season or something.  I legitimately felt bad for chick. I mean, your first time out for the UConn juggernaut, and you get tasked to defend some colossus. And your perfectly sound D still isn't good enough. I could just see her crying in the locker room.


...That's what girls do, right?

Notes From The Thread Nov. 11, 2010

A little bit of background. There is a neverending e-mail thread between me and several of my cronies on which we talk shit about hoops. End a little bit of background.


Games on the docket:
Warriors @ Bulls
Celtics @ Heat
Lakers @ Nuggets

Flamingo: Noah is sensitive..."Lebron please stop dancing as you rape my team", "KG stop dissing me in Shakespearean sonnets", "Dad stop cheating on mom"...


Flamingo: None of the 'Melos play defense in his new commercial.
Me: Are any of them wearing a Knicks jersey?

Izzy Smoove: Yawn @ Charles Barkley. I'm just waiting for when the Heat start winning so he can place LeBron's cock and balls back in his mouth where they were for 7 years.

Flamingo: Dude...Pat Riley started the game sitting in section 347...now in the 4th quarter, he's currently seated in the third row...

Burger: Kobe in Colorado! Chup, I request some #KGTrashTalk.
Me: The defiler is back! All Colorado hamlets--sound thine bells, hide thine young lasses from Kobe! #LALatDEN #KGTrashTalk

Bigguh: Did anyone notice that when a fight broke out in the crowd in the 2nd quarter of the Lakers/Nuggets game, the camera ended up on Ron Artest for like ten seconds?

Grimlock: Ray Allen heard the "Ice Box" 2010 Finals remix and got a li'l upset.